It is a sunny spring day and i have the cold from hell...this sucks! Oh well at least the sun has finally decided to come out...
I watched Catch and Release the other night. I love that movie! One of my favorits...ever since then though I have been a bit obsessed to Boulder Colorado, I am thinking of going there this summer and checking it out. Looks like a nice place.
Anyone been there? Live there?? Feed back on it would be great!
ok I know it's been forever and a day, but my life right now is a bit hard to wra your head around and is busy as ever! Things are ok...just crazy...I am planning on doing a better job blogging though. It's a goal. We shall see.
- Song: Count on Me~ By Default
Sometimes I feel like the walls are closing in around me and nothing I do can stop them. It’s a scary feeling. It’s been a hard few months. I feel like I am sad all the time and I am so sick of being sad I could scream! But just when it feels like maybe it’s getting better life comes along and knocks me on my ass again. All I want to do is curl up in bed, sleep and cry. But of course I can’t do that. I don’t have time to fall apart. God knows I can’t allow myself to actually cry because if I do then I fear I won’t be able to stop. That being the case…My solution? Have a glass of wine and BREATHE. Because that’s about all I can do right now. That, and pray things work out ok in the end. What’s that saying I used to love? “Everything will be ok in the end, because if it’s not ok, then it’s not the end.” Seems a bit far fetched right about now. I think I am leaning more towards the saying, “How will it end? I don’t know. It’s a mystery.” Only this time I am banking on the mystery unraveling soon because if it doesn’t I don’t know how much more I can take. I don’t think there is enough wine in the world to keep me going like this forever. I long for the simpler times. The times when all you had to worry about was if there was going to be another snow day or not. Not even bothering to think far enough ahead to realize that if there is another one it cuts into your summer vacation. That didn’t matter. You just lived for now. I miss that. But if I lived for my now then I would go ahead and allow myself to cry while I drank wine and went to sleep for a year. What do you do when you have done everything you know of to do and it’s still not working???
- Eye Twitch Factor: 18
- Song: this is the story of a girl...I have no idea why so don't ask
- Energy Level: about a negative 5
- Current Book: haven't had time to read in about a month. It sucks
My sister LOVES my fiance and HATES me. What's that?? Seriously. She says two words to me on the phone. Only stays on as long as nessesary to arrange things for the kids and chats him up like they are best friends. He has been on the phone to her laughing for 15 mins. This is rediculous!! WTF!!!???? On a side note...only 9 days left until my wedding. Here's the update... 9 days to go. Work ~1 day left, Thank GOD!!! Emotionally ~ The emotional roller coaster is still in full swing. I just want to sleep for a week and hope for the best. I cry at the drop of a damn hat. This is ridiculous! Heart ~ beating has slowed to what seems like normal. But every so often it feels like it stops all together Sleep ~ Nightmares are BAD!! Dreaming of people killing me now…fun Irritability ~ OH MY GOD!! I just want to slap people! Certain people especially Appetite~ what's that?? Excitement level ~ around a 8 Stress level ~ around a 11 My cold is back in full force. I feel like shit man!! I am all stuffy and I cough up a lung constantly!! Nothing is working to help lighten the symptoms. This blows! (And not in a good way)…stay tuned… On a side note…Wendy moved in last night. Jenni can't come to the wedding, Linz can't come, Wade just texted me and said he might not be able to make it, and NONE of my family besides my mother is going to be there. My sister said she would try to come if something more improtant doesn't come up between now and then...this is seriously fucked up! That's all for now...
So I sat out in the sun today and read while the kids napped. I burned the hell out of myself and as much as that sucks, I am thrilled about it! Why? Because it means that summer is FINALLY FRIGGIN HERE!!!!!!! Whoo hoo!!!
On a side note however, my burn is all lopsided. I was all smart and pulled the straps for my tank down so I wouldn't have kickass strap lines in my STRAPLESS wedding gown, but I apparently didn't pay close enough attention to the way my tank was sitting and now I have a diagonal line going across my chest. I guess Wendy isn't the only one who burns all pretty and stuff...
I got the call today. Well the text actually. I am going to be an auntie again and it's a baby girl!! Precious and perfect she will be...
I just found out that Dee can only stay for 4 days when she comes. Drag!! Oh well at least I will get to see her! That's all that matters right!!??
A little over 2 months to go....sheesh it's getting close!!
Besides the fact that NONE of my friends bothered to remember my birthday except one, (thanks to her for remembering by the way) my birthday was still good.
My mom and I went to get her dress for the wedding and went to lunch on Saturday. I went to a movie with Aug on Saturday night. We saw Sex and the City, which was AMAZING by the way. I loved it!! Then he bought me shoes (you gotta love that) and we went to dinner. Then Sunday (my actual birthday) my Mom came by and spent some time. I got presents from Aug, my mom, my sister, Aug's mom, Kissa and the entire Roosma clan, and Wendy which was very cool of all of them. So sweet. I loved it all!! After my mom left I took a nice hot bath and relaxed the rest of the day. I watched The Girls Next Door for the afternoon and went to bed early...back to the real world today...
Does anyone else CRAVE the smell of summer? You know what I’m talking about? That combination of cut grass, mixed with rain and heat, the smell of sunscreen where ever you go, and if you stand still and breathe deep, you can smell the faintest trail of chlorine. The way you skin smells after you have been in the sun for a while, the smell of flowers and trees finally coming to life once again. The smell of berries ripening on the vine, you can even smell the ice that people put in their coolers. God I love those smells! I crave them all year and the first day I actually get to smell them I get happy all over. Silly huh? I also wait all year to hear the sounds of summer. The ice cream truck, kids playing out side, bikes clanging down the street, and ball hitting the pavement over and over. The sound of water splashing, and roller skate or roller blade wheels on the side walk. Hoses spraying the car or kids, or watering your plants, fans running in the house. Laughter. You hear more laughter in the summer then any other time of the year. The sound of Hotel California blasting out of your stereo, you can’t NOT listen to that song in the summer. The sound of Ice in your glass. Doesn’t matter what it’s a glass of, there is ice in it. God I love summer!!! Nothing else can compare to it!
Wedding invitations are ALL addressed, stamped and ready to go. All I have to do is put them in the mail box. How great is that!!?? That's the part I thought would take the longest. Aug and I sat down yesterday while the daycare kids were watching a movie and we cracked them all out in one go. We had a sweet little system going. I was impressed with us.
Now I have to print the programs and finish the favors. That's it. I am done. All I have to do is sit back and wait for the big day!
We are getting our rings this weekend and registering for the wedding. We haven't decided where to register yet but I am sure it will be several places.
That will all happen on Saturday. My big plans for Sunday and Monday? Lay in the sun and read. Pray for sun. Book suggestions??
Question. I have some serious strap lines ALREADY from wearing strappy tanks in the sun. My gown is strapless. I need to get rid of them NOW. I am planning on laying out in a lovely stylin' tube top from like 1982 that no one should ever wear, this weekend to ensure that no more lines happen. Any other ideas to get rid of them????
We just wanted to share our good news with everyone. Today we bought a timeshare! We are so excited! It's not really a timeshare I guess. They have resorts all over the world and we can use any of them any time of the year. Once it's paid off they can never charge us more money and we can will it to our kids and their kids. It's ours forever! We couldn't be happier! We just wanted to share the news with everyone.